Funny Stories for Monday floating around.
Towards the end of a job interview, the recruiter asked a young engineer fresh out of an Ivy League school, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The Engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." The recruiter said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, a company matching retirement fund for 50 percent of your salary, and a company car leased every 2 years -- say, a red Corvette?" The engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the recruiter replied, "Yeah, but you started it."
If the recruiter has a hard time deciding where the candidate fits in the company, here's some help;
The following guidelines shall be used when hiring new employees. Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and put them in a room with only a table and two chairs. Leave them alone for two hours, without any instruction. At the end of that time, go back and see what they are doing.
If they have taken the table apart in that time, put them in Engineering.
If they are counting the butts in the ashtray, assign them to Finance.
If they are screaming and waving their arms, send them off to Manufacturing.
If they are talking to the chairs, Human Resources Dept is a good spot for them.
If they are sleeping, they are Management material.
If they are writing up the experience, send them to Tech Pubs.
If they don't even look up when you enter the room, assign them to Security.
If they try to tell you it's not as bad as it looks, send them to Marketing.
And if they have left early, put them in Sales.